Nenny Miyu Page

Someone told someone and I heard it 😋

“At this point, adulthood should come with customer support.”

Because apparently everybody is out here updating software called “life” with no manual 😭

One minute you’re motivated,
next minute you’re calculating transport, bills, future, healing, and what to eat at the same time 💔

And somehow everybody expects you to have life figured out; meanwhile you’re tired, confused, a little broke, and trying your best"

If you get it, you get it
゚

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I went to a party and I saw one guy dancing around a lady like he was doing “delivery service” for attention 😭

Not even normal dancing o.

This brother was just going round her in circles; forward, back, side, small shoulder shake… repeat.

At first I thought maybe they came together.

But no.

The lady was just standing there, holding her drink, looking like she came for peace and accidentally entered an experiment.

No smile. No reaction. Just calm face like “please continue, I am studying your behavior.” 😭

Meanwhile the guy was fully committed.

If confidence was energy, this guy was on generator.

At some point he even adjusted his shirt mid-dance like he was about to receive award.

I was just watching like, is this dancing or job interview for boyfriend position?

Because the way he was moving, it was giving “please consider me” energy.

The worst part?

The lady just turned to her friend and started talking.

No acknowledgment.

Nothing.

That was when I knew…

Some people are not dancing at parties,

They are doing unpaid emotional labour in public. 😂😂

I quietly returned to my food, my own mission was simple: eat and leave. 😂😂😂 ゚

The Price Negotiation Olympics 😂

I saw one fine slippers.

I said:
“Madam, how much is this?”

She looked at me, sized me up from head to toe…
then said:

“₦12,000.”

I didn’t even argue… I just laughed.
Because clearly, this is not a price, this is a test of character.

I said:
"₦12,000.”

I didn’t even argue, I just laughed.
Because clearly, this is not a price, this is a test of character.

I said:
“Okay, how much last?”

She said:
“₦11,500. I like you, that’s why.”

Ah. Love has entered business.

I said:
“I have ₦4,000.”

She held her chest like Nollywood just cast her.

“Jesus! For this economy??
You want me to run at a loss??”

I started walking away gently like a peaceful customer.

She shouted:
“Come back! How much you say you get??”

I increased small:
“₦4,500.”

She said:
“Okay bring ₦10,000, carry it.”

I kept walking.

₦8,000! Final!”

I reached junction…

“₦6,500! Last last price!”

At this point, even the slippers were confused about their destiny.

I turned back slowly

Because this is now a spiritual battle.

I finally bought it

Then saw the same slippers in the next shop for ₦3,500

The real price is hiding somewhere between drama and walking away.

So, walking away is not leaving, it’s part of the negotiation. 😂😂 ゚

The ‘I’m Coming’ Lie

My friend said:
“I’m close, just 5 minutes.”

I was shocked.
Because this is someone that normally moves like NEPA light.

I said okay… maybe she has changed.
Maybe growth is real.

I even stood outside waiting like a serious person.

10 minutes… nothing.
20 minutes… I adjusted my slippers.
30 minutes… I called her.

She picked and said:
“I’m around the corner.”

Which corner please???

Because I’ve checked all the corners in this area,
even the spiritual ones… no sign of her.

45 minutes… I called again.

This time she said:
“I’m almost there, I can see your street.”

At this point, even my ancestors were waiting with me.

1 hour later…

Madam finally showed up… smiling like she just came from next door.

No apology. No shame. Just vibes.

I asked her calmly:
“Where are you coming from?”

I asked her calmly:
“Where are you coming from?”

She said:
“My house.”

I just laughed small.

this “I’m close” she told me…
I now realize this "I'm close" she told me was not a location —
it was a state of mind

In Lagos, ‘I’m coming’ means ‘I’ve started thinking about coming. 😂😂 ゚

Adult life will humble you 😭

An old secondary school friend called me from Nigeria recently, and I honestly didn’t know whether to laugh or pray for her 😭

She started opening up about her marriage with 3 kids…

According to her, she does literally everything in the house; cooking, taking care of the children, paying bills, and even house rent 💔

She said since they got married, her husband has never paid house rent once 😭

Even the things inside the house, chairs, table, bed, everything — she bought them one by one. The house looks fully furnished but funded by one person’s salary 😭😂

She even said the only thing that truly belongs to her husband is his clothes
and even those ones were bought by her 😭

At some point in the call, I just went quiet like: "So your husband is just a permanent tenant in your house?” 😂

She let out a sigh and said, “It is what it is.”

Life really comes with different packages. ゚

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One vibe at a time ✨

This lady I know has been trying to change her apartment for weeks now, and the matter almost turned her life upside down 😭

Her rent had already expired, so she was literally living on “borrowed time” in the house like VIP guest that overstayed 😂

Every day she would go out house hunting with hope, and come back looking like she attended emotional damage class

One landlord said, “It’s available, but you must pay 2 years upfront.”
She just stood there blinking like her brain needed reboot 😭

Another house looked perfect online, but when she got there, the gate was doing “do not enter unless you are strong” vibes 😂

At some point she called me and said,
“I think houses in this city are forming selective friendship with me.”

After weeks of stress, confusion, and emotional wahala, reality finally entered her body 😭

She had to renew her rent back in the same house

She said, “At least I know this one’s problems already… let me not go and add new stress to my stress.”

Now she’s back in her house like someone that just finished a long journey

Sometimes, peace is not in changing environment… it is in managing what you already understand 😌 ゚

My neighbor has refused to wash the toilet for TWO WEEKS now… and it’s his turn o 😭

Every time you remind him, it’s: “I’m busy.”
Busy doing what??? Breathing??? 😂

This is a proper face me I face you house, so you can imagine the tension… everybody is just managing and avoiding eye contact like we’re in a war zone 🚶🏽‍♀️

At this point, I’ve decided:
I will wash the toilet myself…

But as I finish ehn—
I’m carrying the key like gold 🗝️

Since everybody is “busy,” nobody will use it again 😭

Let’s all be busy together 😌

゚

Morning Hustle + Small Embarrassment 😂☀️

This morning I told myself I will wake up early and be productive.

I even set alarm like someone going to important interview.

The alarm rang.

I heard it.

I ignored it with full confidence.

Next thing I knew… I opened my eyes and sunlight was already entering my room like it paid rent 😭

I jumped up like something was chasing me.

No time for slow movement. I entered bathroom speed of light.

On my way out, I greeted my neighbor outside with confidence:

“Good morning sir!”

He looked at me small… then replied:

“Good afternoon.”

AFTERNOON???

I checked sky like maybe sun is lying to me.

So I just smiled and continued walking like I planned my life this way.

On the road, I saw people already active—selling, talking, rushing life.

Me? I was still trying to mentally adjust from “morning mindset” to “afternoon reality.”

One guy even shouted:
“Boss, you just dey come out?”

I just nodded like:
“Yes… I’m fashionably late in life.”

At this point, I accepted something:

Not every day will start the way you planned…

But at least we showed up 😂

If your morning has ever humbled you like this, just know you’re not alone 😭☀️