ANCA GRAY

friends, i’ve decided to stop trying to post updates on facebook. it keeps my attention divided and it does not spark joy.

if you would like to receive studio updates and joy-enhancing downloads, find me on instagram or sign up for my email at ancagray.com
hope to see you there!

thank you for your ongoing support of my work.

✨ENCOURAGEMENT FOR TIMES OF INTENSE GRIEF✨⁣
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if you know me, you know i’m a huge advocate for the intentional pursuit of joy.⁣
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but your capacity for feeling joy fully and deeply is directly proportional with your ability to sit with grief. it’s like frank sinatra says - you can’t have one without the other. ⁣
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a lot has been said about this, so i won’t philosophize right now. instead, i will offer some additional words of encouragement for when you find yourself in barely bearable pain or when you bravely choose to go directly through the the grief instead of ignoring or sidestepping it.⁣
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1. a little abstract, but profound if you let it sink in: deeply feeling the full spectrum of emotion is your gift to the divine. the goddess that chose to embody you (the spirit that comes from Source and lives as you) longs for the full human experience...⁣
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2. ... so your true self can find the pleasure in feeling everything that needs to be felt - including the pain. ⁣
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3. think of how you want to be loved when you are struggling, and love the f*** out of yourself. you’re the expert on you, so put that knowledge to good use and give yourself the juiciest most epic loving you are capable of.⁣
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4. when you are going through the fire, and it all feels gut-wrenching, hopeless, impossible, remember this is the part of the story where you grow by leaps and bounds:⁣
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wow, what an opportunity to grow and become even more of a badass!⁣
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5. as you get better at holding space for yourself, you become a better lover - you’ll learn how to hold space for others as well. ⁣
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detail of work in progress. ⁣
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scrumptious layers i really really don’t want to let go of. ⁣
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this is the part of the process where the painting and i hang. i ask her what she needs and i stare and stare and stare for a good long while. ⁣
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i so wish i could just keep all the parts i love, yet i know very well that i need to let go. at least some if not much of it needs to be layered over to make for a more cohesive whole. ⁣
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⁣ever learning to trust the process.
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i’m not for everyone -⁣
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- a n i n t r o d u c t i o n⁣
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ciao. i’m anca.⁣
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i disobey. i love hard.⁣
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i make art out of simple materials. old papers, paint, glue, charcoal, fabric, thread, things found around the house or in the street - trusting the abundance of the universe.⁣
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i have zero patience for small talk. ⁣
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climbing mountains at least a couple of times per year is essential for optimal living. ⁣
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ditto two and a half pots of tea per day. ⁣
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i write weird poetry.⁣
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i am raising two girls to be their own people and without mom guilt. ⁣
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i am relentless about pursuing joy, while also honoring ALL of the feelings. ⁣
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play is holy. i cosplay, adventure, explore, start water fights. ⁣
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i can help you befriend your heart and create the things you are uniquely here to create. currently working on putting together a workshop where we practice it together - through art, writing, listening, and other playful explorations. ⁣
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leave me a comment if you feel that it’s for you, and i will keep you updated. ⁣
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i have a bunch of little paintings in various mediums at different stages in the process strewn all over my studio, yet i had to put all that in hold because this lovely lady beckoned me to help bring her to life. ⁣
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she is a rest rebel, a saint of ease, our lady of no hustling. ⁣
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i feel had she is meant for one of you. if it’s you, message me and we will find a way to make it happen. you are worthy of epic inspiring art that is a joy to behold every single day and remind you of who you are and the brilliant life you are here to create. i can help make her happen, no matter what your budget, so if she is for you, hit me up. ⁣
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and follow her progress in my stories. ⁣
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i’m so freakin’ proud of every single one of these pieces. and they are all available in my shop right now (ancagray.com)
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take a closer look. the details are scrumptious and they are so full of soul. ⁣
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all i want is to keep creating love, beauty, and possibility, and keep sharing my gifts with the world. so i try to keep my originals affordable. but if you see something that calls to you and it feels unattainable, let me know. i would love to work with you on a payment plan. ⁣
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lastly, can i urge you to choose joy today? be with whatever it is that needs feeling first. ⁣
and when you’re through, give joy a turn. ⁣
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there is so much suffering all around and i ⁣
used to choose it. it was exulted to me as the highest of virtues, and i accepted the lie that loving and creating requires suffering. ⁣
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boy was it a journey to break free from that one! ⁣
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these new works were created from a place of freedom and i hope that can be felt and imparted. ⁣
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much love, ⁣
-ag.⁣
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how do you handle your resistance?⁣
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is it something you fight or try to sidestep? ⁣
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it is such a common thread of experience for artists, and anyone who creates anything of value in the world. ⁣
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i find it liberating to befriend my resistance. see what it’s trying to tell me. is it a “no”, or a “not yet”? is it showing me that i am trying to perform based on external input rather than from my heart? there is always a way through it if we are willing to listen to what it has to tell us. ⁣
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as artists especially, we are such visual creatures and often get caught up with aesthetics we feel drawn to. we feed ourselves all of these beautiful images, yet most of the time, we do not feel nourished. ⁣
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we end up comparing, feeling like we fall short, discouraged, overwhelmed. we think of the pretty images we consume as inspiration, but more often than not, they actually feed our insecurities. ⁣
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this can create in sense resistance to play, exploration, and creating the things we are here to create.⁣
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i take a two step approach when i feel this happening. ⁣
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first, i decide how i want to feel, then i create a space for myself that supports those feelings. this goes both for online and in my home or studio life. i literally unfollow pretty accounts on a regular basis. ⁣
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UNFOLLOW = freedom button. ⁣
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then, i work on listening to my desires and giving myself the things i need. what is nourishing you me? drinking my tea slowly with no distractions? cleaning the studio or the kitchen? writing in my journal? pulling out some old forgotten art supplies? music? just breathing for a while? ⁣
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from that space, my own creativity and motivation flows.⁣
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free play and exploration can feel intimidating when we are tempted to pursue a particular outcome or aesthetic. but we can always return to ourselves. accept and give some love to our inner child, then go play from that newfound place of freedom. ⁣
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details i am loving right now that might have to transform.⁣
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this work is such and exercise in letting go. ⁣
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be deeply in this moment, take in all the goodness, and allow it to become what it becomes.⁣
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rigidity is a co**se. life is constant movement. you have to decide to enjoy the dance. ⁣
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notes on how to become a life artist. ⁣
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to live poetry is better than to write it. ⁣
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it’s all about play, darling. ⁣
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look to really see. move things around. go ahead and get your hands dirty. do a little dance. move like a jellyfish. don’t hold your breath. really feel the elements. ask the page or the canvas or the situation what it needs. actually listen.⁣
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throw some things around haphazardly while distracted. see where they land. draw with your eyes closed. scribble, scratch, tear, crumple, burn, slap. fling this. breathe your way through that. choose by scent. ⁣
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follow your curiosity. open the way to the impossible. pretend you are whoever you want to be. really savor the mystery in the process.⁣
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we’re all HERE NOW, in this lush and beautiful garden, but some don’t see clearly. vision - blurry at best. ⁣
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the good news is we can all feel our way through the staggering beauty. the more we use our senses, the sharper they become. ⁣
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l e t’ s g o e x p l o r i n g !⁣
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work in progress.⁣
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"try softer". ⁣⁣⁣
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have you heard me say "try softer" before?⁣⁣⁣
i at least hashtag the heck out of it. it's also a great thing to tattoo on yourself. speaking from experience. ⁣⁣⁣
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what have you tried your hardest to do? ⁣⁣⁣
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for so long i tried hard to be good. i tried hard to love my abusers. to make relationships work. i tried hard to believe. i tried hard to understand. to make good art. to live a creative life. to make my parents proud. to serve god. ⁣⁣⁣
i tried hard to rebel. to create beauty. to be seen, but not too much. to hold on to hope. to find my voice. ⁣⁣⁣
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contrary to popular belief, trying hard is not hunkering down, stepping up, or acting yourself more intensely . it has nothing to do with being yourself. ⁣⁣⁣
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trying hard is giving in to pressure from the outside. ⁣⁣⁣
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trying softer is surrendering to your truest self and living from the heart. it's living in acceptance of, playful exploration, and harmony with yourself. ⁣⁣⁣
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softness is not weakness. ⁣⁣⁣
it is relaxing, letting go fo the tight grip, and breathing through the ups and downs of this crazy rollercoaster ride we call life so you can actually enjoy it.⁣⁣⁣
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trying softer is trusting the wisdom and abundance of the universe, trusting that there is enough to go around, trusting that you are supported and held up. ⁣⁣⁣
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it is flowing with the constant current of goodness in the way that water cuts a path through hard rock. ⁣⁣⁣
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trying softer is harnessing the magic of the here and now. it's trusting your heart to create the life you actually want to live. ⁣⁣
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it’s saturday and there’s nowhere else i’d rather be. can you relate?
what’s your happy place today?