Interesting-fact

One who looks for a friend without faults will have none

Lost time is never found again

Every good friendship requires mutual respect and trust. However, these components won't be there without effort and energy from both parties. Effective communication is needed to build and maintain a healthy, solid foundation for a friendship. To communicate well, you need to know how to listen, build trust and deal with any issues that may cause tension.

Study Listening
As you talk with your friend, make sure you are fully engaged in the topic. Make eye contact and demonstrate your understanding of what she is saying with appropriate body language, such as a supportive nod or a sympathetic head shake. Isodora Alman, a therapist, suggests giving your buddy the chance to speak without interruption and reflecting back what you heard after she is done. This demonstrates that you have paid attention carefully and value what she has to say.

Back Up Your Words with Deeds
If you don't show your friend that you will always be there for her, saying that she can rely on you is meaningless. Friendships are more likely to remain trustworthy when everyone knows what to anticipate from one another, according to Michele. Building trust can be achieved, for instance, by promising your friend that you'll accompany her to the gym and then showing up each week to lift weights together. Because you demonstrated to your buddy that she can rely on you, she will be able to trust your statements.

Face Conflict Head-On
Arguments among friends can be constructive if they are handled properly. According to psychologist Susan Heitler, fighting, defending oneself, and avoiding the situation totally are all unhealthy methods to handle conflict "What Makes Conflict?, a Psychology Today article How are disputes settled?" The only method to solve the issue is to discuss it with your friend. Before offering alternate solutions to the disagreement, exploring the benefits and drawbacks of each, and finally arriving to a compromise, all parties must acknowledge that there is a conflict. If both of your issues are taken care of, neither of you will feel underappreciated, and the successful conclusion of the dispute will enhance your relationship.

“Keep away from those who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you believe that you too can become great.” — Mark Twain

One of the main causes of arguments between friends and, occasionally, the termination of their connection is a lack of communication. Things that weren't a big worry at first can turn into major issues merely because of improper communication between two parties.

Listen
By far, the biggest communication issue is a lack of listening abilities. It is the reason for:

A friend may feel hurt if they think you aren't listening.
Misunderstandings (when you presume what a friend is going to say and miss the actual point) (when you assume what a friend is going to say and miss the actual point)
Arguments (occurring when you hear only a few words and become enraged since your friend doesn't seem to be saying what you want them to).
Learn to actively listen so that you can comprehend all your friend is saying. It will also give your friend the impression that they are being heard.

Recognize the Moments When the Message is Lost
Do you and your friends typically misunderstand each other at particular times? Have any of your Facebook plans fallen through? Or did you text a pal to arrange a meeting place but they never showed up? Or maybe your friend mistook your attempt at being compassionate in an email to be making fun of them and became upset with you.

Change the way you interact if there are specific circumstances that consistently produce issues between you and your friend. We might become far too accustomed to using Facebook or email as opposed to simply picking up the phone and leaving a message. Change your communication strategy if the one you're utilizing isn't working. To do this, you might have to step outside of your comfort zone.

Be Prepared for Your Comments
If you're the kind of person who starts a narrative without knowing how it will end, you might be doing the same thing when you talk to your pals on a regular basis. Perhaps you have something in mind to say to them, but your thoughts stray, and you wind up chatting about a lot of other topics instead. If this works for your friendship, it's acceptable, but if there are frequently occurring misunderstandings, it's time to use the mental edit button.

How can you tell if you're talking too much? Watch alert for circumstances like these:

Although you didn't mean it that way, your friend grew upset because they took something you said personally.
When you weren't actually complaining, your friend assumed that you were.
Your friend complained that they were sick of hearing you tell the same old tales.
Develop Your Assertiveness

Many people mistakenly believe that being assertive entails bullying others, but the truth is that it just entails speaking to others with confidence when you have something to say. This suggests that you take immediate action to remedy a problem rather than waiting for it to worsen. Or that you offer your opinion with assurance despite the fact that you are certain your friend would disagree. You treat everyone with respect, you don't dispute, but you also don't let one person take over the conversation.

When friends cross their limits, being assertive involves gently correcting them. This makes fights less frequent and helps you avoid the unfavorable emotions that can develop over the course of a connection.

Make Your Points Known When It Is Time

Often, it's not what you say that matters, but rather when and how you say it. There are some talks that simply go more smoothly at certain times.

Avert situations like this:

You both need to get out of here quickly.
Your companion is preoccupied with the kids or at work.
Attending a party.
The center of attention is elsewhere (at an awards banquet or birthday party, for example.)
You're surrounded by those who can overhear you.
It can be challenging when, for instance, you're upset with a friend and you just want to quit the conversation because you know it will be unpleasant. But waiting until you have the opportunity to discuss things in detail is the mature thing to do. Without it, you'll wind up making your friendship's issues worse.

Ensure Your Calmness

You'll surely say things you don't mean while you're angry. There are some things you just can't take back once you've said them. Wait until you've calmed down instead, even if that takes a day or two.

If you still feel angry and your friend wants to talk, let them know:

"I really want to discuss this with you, but I need to calm down first because I'm now quite upset. I believe that if I allow myself a day to consider this, it will be better for our connection."

What can you both do to improve your communication?
Don't point the finger onto a friend if you discover that you and them frequently struggle to communicate. It's possible that you are the issue. What works for one buddy may not work for another since various friendship groups communicate in different ways.

Ask your pal how you two can communicate more effectively instead. Use a phrase like:

"Recently, I've noticed that there have been a few misunderstandings about meeting up after work. How can this be fixed? Would you like me to give you a call before I leave? You an email, please?"

"I posted about the party on your Facebook wall, but I guess you didn't see it. Even if I use Facebook frequently, it's acceptable if you don't. Please let me know how best to reach you so I won't forget about you the next time."

"I am aware that you have been texting me throughout the day, but I am truly unable to respond. I'd prefer a phone call, please. That makes it easier for me to speak with you."

Work to improve your friendship by setting goals.

Make sure that every exchange you have is intended to advance your friendship. It may be best to just leave them alone if what you're saying or doing isn't helpful for your friendship. In the end, you want your friendship to be a place where both of you feel comfortable speaking your minds without fear of being judged or misunderstood.

“I think if I’ve learned anything about friendship, it’s to hang in, stay connected, fight for them, and let them fight for you. Don’t walk away, don’t be distracted, don’t be too busy or tired, don’t take them for granted. Friends are part of the glue that holds life and faith together. Powerful stuff.” — Jon Katz

Practice Structured Dialog

Using structured dialog can improve your relationship, says behavioral analyst Stephanie Michele in her "Huffington Post" article, "Communication Boosters: Relationship Improvement Exercises." Aim to have the conversation for about 15 to 30 minutes, on a topic that inspires a verbal exchange of experiences, such as your greatest passions or your favorite holiday destinations. Listen to what your friend has to say and confirm that you understand, then share your own experiences and emotions in relation to the topic.